for all i know, this isnt my fault. i am not going to apologise for it. if my life is meant to be this way, there's nothing i can do to avoid it or change it. as much as i hate it, there is nothing i can do !!!! so stop making things difficult for me and as if its my fault. i really dont wish things to happen this way. i tried to be hard-heart, i tried to be selfish, i tried to not think for others, i tried not to show any signs of care and concerns for anybody, i tried to be the worst fren ever and i even tried to be a horrible person !! by doing all these isnt making me feel any better, things aren't going well or as wad i wanted !! everytime i harded my heart on anyone or anything, they just keep coming. everytime i turn away from frens, they come reaching for the bottom of my heart.

i dont want to hurt anybody. if i did hurt u, i am truly sorry, i really am.

i was wrong. all this while i thought i am right. i was wrong. i must stop. stop avoiding. it's time. time to face the reality. but i'm afraid. afraid.. of so many things. so afraid.. till.. i'd rather keep everything to myself. that's when i thought i'm right. so it's a cycle. i was wrong.  

im afriad..